Make America Multicultural Again

The Music Settlement: Preschool - Room 141

I had been toying with the idea of writing a story just for fun for a long, long time. I always wondered if it would be in the form of an illustrated multicultural children’s book. Writing a book about kids from blended families and heritages like our son’s seemed to make a lot of sense.

“I’m half-Italian and half-Cleveland,” our son said matter-of-factly to the La Barberia hairdresser’s delight in Little Italy, sticking his chin out from his draped blue poly kid smock…

Of course there was no Little Philippines by comparison as an option with a kid-friendly Filipino menu of cute, bite-sized mini egg rolls and chicken adobe fingers. Just sayin’.

Palm to forehead proud mom moment right there. I literally just did a special presentation on the Philippines with him at his preschool on Multicultural Day in Room 141. Sitting on the rainbow morning circle rug. Waving a mini Filipino flag for pint-sized him. Passing around fresh mangoes and furry coconuts for a science-y show and tell. We made a last-minute black foam core board filled with printed Wikipedia images of candy-colored jeepney buses, street festival dancers, 7,100 tropical islands, and long-lashed Filipino beauty pageant contestants in traditional exaggerated butterfly-sleeve formal wear. (FYI, that was for our son’s girlfriends – a.k.a. little gal pals – who were REALLY into princesses at the time. I felt like they needed to see another example of global, multicultural beauty standards and royal princess gowns beyond Disney’s version – ‘ya know what I mean?)

“I’ll never forget that day in PS-141 when my then 4-year old son didn’t realize that he was even Filipino himself. Right there by the laminated ABC, 123 easel. Wait, what?!”

Here we are trying to make sure he had equal parts exposure to Kindermusic, Little Gym, The Cleveland Museum of Art, Paw Patrol, fruits and veggies, well-rounded indoor to outdoor ratio play date time. And in that split second and to my horror, I realized that we had made no real time to talk about his one-of-a-kind cultural identity or even the generational sacrifices that came before his birth? Talk about an entitled generation?! And bad parenting?! Double whammy?! Ugh! I kept my last name after getting married because the thought of losing – no conceding – my identity, both as an independent modern woman and Filipina with a proud family heritage in one fell swoop royally ruffled and rumpled my proverbial Filpino-American Princess ball gown – ‘ya know what I mean?

Roxboro Elementary School: Multicultural Night - 1st Grade

Me, holding a handmade parol that we made to celebrate our Filipino Christmas heritage. Traditional parols are made of bamboo and Japanese paper symbolizing the Star of Bethlehem.

It dawned on me. Our little guy didn’t even realize that the woman who gave him life and whose cramped right knee he was balancing on while doing our joint poster presentation, rationing out dried mangoes at snack time, had dual citizenship in Manila. That he was so fortunate for having a precious and privileged preschool life as a second-generation kid – in THE United States. As his peers and their tiny toddler hands clapped for us in mild confusion. They too didn’t realize that their playground pal was “Filipino” — umm, whatever that meant? — as they shrugged their mini-shoulders in unison waiting for more dried mango snacks.

“Could our son ever understand that I never dreamt of the opportunities that lay ahead of him like an endless yellow LEGO brick road paved with (yes, I must agree…) annoying participation medals and trophies?”

With 24/7 access to the almighty internet, iPad or iPhone at his sticky toddler fingertips. How would I ever be able to capture the generational sacrifices and struggles that were made for him? And me?

As a parent, I always wondered how my own parents felt leaving behind their culture and homeland to adopt another one entirely. And how my elderly Filipino grandparents felt about my parents, their son and daughter, leaving the life and lands of their ancestors to take up one across the sea and across the world – where there wasn’t even a single rice field to be had. (Only Midwestern corn fields for that matter.) What stories did my grandparents share and weave to soothe their own broken muted hearts, staying stoic and silent in order to make room for their now married, newlywed children’s upgraded American Dream?

Roxboro Elementary School: Multicultural Night - 2nd Grade

I needed to make sure that my son knew he was half-Filipino and never, ever forget it – Multicultural Day or not! So went the many elementary school Multicultural Days that followed where we would unbury our dusty “MANILA” labeled plastic bin from the basement, re-purpose our poster board digital image files and trek to the Asian market for dried mangoes.

I admit, I felt like a Filipino imposter all around. Not American enough, not quite Filipino enough to cook all the traditional dishes from scratch or to understand and speak Tagalog. Plus I was always running late to even make it on time to decorate our barely there heritage table with dried, pre-packaged mangoes. (At least the flag was nice and big?!)

Sigh…now as our half-brown boy has grown up, we continue exploring how to celebrate his blended cultural identity given the way the world is unfolding and the fact that Multicultural Days are a fading, distant memory.

“When I reminded him that he has a ‘mom of color?’ He responded in kind (ahem, kinda)…’I’m only brown in the summer, Mom, after camp...’”

We are clearly still working on this!! And that is how this story in your hands of a certain “Other Brown Girl” and “Woman of Culture” was born. And how I hope it will evolve, live on, and be passed on beyond a certain “Half-Brown Boy” and me.

How do you celebrate your heritage and homelands with your second-generation kids? What new conversations can be sparked? What new stories shared and told?

Roxboro Elementary School: Multicultural Night - 3rd Grade

Celebrating two generations of Filipino + Half-Filipino Heritages.

Roxboro Elementary School: Multicultural Night - 3rd Grade

Guest debut with Lola (Grandma) from San Fran and an amazing Southeast Asian dance troupe. (Lola’s homemade Filipino pancit noodle dish was a hit!)